Sometime, probably in my early twenties, I defined “old people” by their conversations about medications, doctors, and their surgical procedures. As most healthy young people, I felt invincible and health was rarely on my mind.
That was 4 decades ago, and like many of you have, and the rest of you probably will, I discovered what it’s like to spend lengthy hours on a hospital bed, looking at the ceiling, feeling helpless and nonproductive. Eight days in a local hospital in interior Brazil, with no window to the outside world, I lost track of what day and night were. Hooked up to seven different tubes and connectors, my restlessness increased because movement was near impossible.
Once home, ordered by the doctor to spend another 30 days in bed, I did read and had some access to Fox News. In this phase of recuperation, I was drawn to the amount of US TV ads having to do with health and medication. Most medication ads spend the first five seconds telling you all the good the medicine will do for you, and the next fifteen seconds that it could kill you! I find those side effects discouraging.
As a Missionary Pastor, I have been in hospitals more times than I can remember, but always seated on the chair visiting the one on the bed. This time, during my time on the bed, I am so thankful for the almost-daily visitors, area pastors, church friends, and several fishing buddies.
Having never been on a hospital bed, I had not thought about the difference between what makes a good visit and a not so good visit. For you that may have opportunities to sit on the visitor’s chair and spend time with the one on the hospital bed, I now have a few suggestions:
1. Don’t try to outdo the medical condition of the one you visit with your past medical procedures. Empathy toward the one on the bed is more helpful.
2. If you’re a funny guy, you may want to take it easy on joke telling. The jokes were great, however, I almost blew a couple of my stitches two days after surgery.
3. Don’t come into the room looking scared to death. A pleasant smile is better for the patient’s emotional state.
4. Don’t pay more attention to the nurses than to the patient, even if they are more interesting and talkative.
5. Try to keep from saying “you are going to be just fine,” unless you are a medical professional and know what you’re talking about.
6. Keep your friend on the bed in the loop. Usually they want to know what is happening in the circles they have had to leave for a season.
7. Don´t forget them once they are well. They may be living the answer to your prayers.
It’s been great chatting with you. After 42 days of being chauffeured around, today I have been allowed to drive… it’s so good to get back to work!
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